school guilt

With back to school looming, I know there are lots of nervous parents out there. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t worried. My husband and I have changed our school plans multiple times. We finally nervously decided to send Baby T-REX to Kindergarten. I have bought all the school supplies, all the cute back to school clothes, and the most important thing masks. It all feels surreal, 10 days until school starts here, other towns have opened and already moved to online. I am not sure how this will go, how it will all work out. I am trying to stay positive because the world must keep going. My children know to wear masks and wear them better than most adults I know. I know masks aren’t 100% it is helpful. I feel guilty for sending him to school. I just need to get back to work, he needs to get back to learning. I have tried to teach him at home over the summer during the lock down. We got nothing done. I don’t think he learned anything and I just spent my time being frustrated. Who wants to be that grumpy mummy? Not me.

I keep telling myself I am not alone, all parents are loosing their shit right now. Talking to my friends and Facebook I can see it is. It is just hard and the guilt is real. I had major wins at work this week and I can’t enjoy it. Hearing him, with his little voice tell me he wants home school breaks my heart. I can not be super mom and a good employee or even a good wife without school hours so I can focus. Multitasking takes its toll and my health is still not normal. The struggle is real.

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